Bangkok, pom tee nee mah

Soon, Bangkok will be my new home.   I ultimately agreed to go work for Siam Computer and Language.  In the end, there was too much uncertainty about other placements.  The high likelihood that I would be teaching a large range of ages, seeing each class only once a week, seemed just too overwhelming for me at this point.  I am afraid that without guidance my first foray into international teaching could sour me on the whole thing.  With the experience and support that Siam seems to offer, I should be better equipped to tackle something of that magnitude in the future.
While the prospect of returning to a major metropolis is not in and of itself cause for jubilation, Bangkok does offer many positives. The disparity between the reality of the opportunities and the fantasies of mine before I got here proved to be the largest hurdle to overcome in making my decision.  What I came to realize was that I am not passing up the opportunity to explore rural Thailand, but rather better preparing myself for it.  Viewing the possibilities of exploring the wonders of Thai life within the city in a positive light has helped immensely.  What appeared to be a negative now seems rife with possibilities.
There are still many things to figure out now that this decision has been made.  My acceptance email arrived today, but I still do not know which school I will be teaching in, or for that matter, what ages.  A handful of schools were looking for teachers like me, but the company has not yet placed me.  All on the list, however, have at least three experienced foreign teachers like myself in place already.  They are all teaching positions for a maximum of two grade levels, and most appear to be in the range of 12-16 years old.  While I would have preferred a slightly younger set of students, I am tremendously excited.  The schools are located within the city, but are within quite different areas.
I look forward to hearing more from my new employers.  I hope to soon learn which school I will be in so that I can begin the process of finding housing and learning about my new neighborhood.  I have a tremendous amount of anxious energy.  Sometimes the reality of these new experiences comes upon me in waves.  These decisions can feel at times surreal, and waypoints such as this at once ground me in the present and urge me forward.
Tomorrow we will be taking a large, comprehensive grammar and phonology exam.  The stress has been slowly ratcheting up among the group since our return from Ko Samet.  I haven’t studied like this in quite a while, and it has never been easy for me.  Topics that I am interested in I acquire as if by mutual attraction.  Applying myself to learning in a regimented, theoretical way makes a sieve of my mind, with holes that are too big.  Procrastination, inattention, and frustration seem to walk hand in hand with the structure of formal education for me.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel, though.  Next week we begin our practical teaching.  Each day we will teach a forty-minute lesson to some of the monks and observe four of our classmates.  The topics are assigned, as is the basic structure, but we are free to approach them as we see fit.  This is what I have looking forward to since we arrived at school for the first day.  While I am certainly nervous about the aspect of standing in front of a room full of Thai children, looking at their expectant faces, I know that the mistakes that I will make can easily be corrected and that I can ultimately teach them. 
Before I face that challenge though, we have a weekend to enjoy.  A small contingent of us will be renting motorbikes on Saturday and traveling to a nearby National Park.  It will be a day trip, starting early.  I believe the park is about seventy square kilometers and offers the possibility of glimpsing elephants, monkeys, and other wildlife.  The group consists of some of my closest friends here, and between the motorbike adventure and natural beauty I’m sure that we’ll have a memorable time.
These thoughts of fun to come may bring a smile to my face, but they don’t get me any closer to memorizing how phonemes are produced.  For that, I must return to studying.  Drop me a line if you get a chance.  While I may not have time to respond, I always appreciate hearing from those interested.